Her little house.
After all the fuss about moving last weekend proved to be a lot easier than we expected. Mum used the shower on Sunday and found that to be a wonderful experience so she then decided she would move in after all and she really liked it. Relief. A lovely set of voiles in the window and a few pictures moved down from her old room and it looks very cosy.
Mum decided as she had enjoyed the shower so much she would try the room for a night on Sunday and see how it goes. Brilliant night, she went to bed at her usual time and slept through till 7ish in the morning. Too good to be true? Yes. Monday night/ Tuesday morning about 3 oclock I hear cries of Help Help. Flashbacks to the first few days of the caravan holiday. I find Mum halfway up the stairs in tears, hard to tell if she is asleep or awake so gently guide her back to bed and sit with her for an hour or so till she calms and drifts off back into a deep sleep. I think she had half woken and found herself in a strange room and panicked, to be expected I suppose. We kept Mum busy moving clothes and deciding where things should go in her room, something she really enjoys, and generally putting the finishing touches.
Through the week Mum has settled in very well, even describing the rooms as "Her little house". Obviously there are a few teething problems, I think the mirror wardrobe doors may have to go as they seem to cause some confusion as to how many doors and beds there are in the room. If that is the worst part of the move its a very small price to pay.
When you take on the role of carer for a parent you face a lot of trials and tests, especially with a condition like dementia. Watching the gradual deterioration is a hard thing to live with. Someone who has always been a tower of strength and able to deal with any problem that comes their way gradually disappearing to be replaced with someone who becomes more and more reliant on yourself. To watch the frustration and anger take a hold as everyday things become more and more difficult can be heartbreaking. This week we had a new bridge to cross. Mum has started to wet herself.
There`s no easy way to type that. My mum has started to wet herself. Not a lot can prepare you for having to mop up after your Mum, get her to change and wash the clothes she was wearing, and try to keep her calm as she is, obviously, very distressed. Obviously this could be a temporary thing, we will find out at the doctors tomorrow if we can get mum to describe any symptoms. So far there doesn`t seem to be any " It just happens"
I thought long and hard whether to mention this here, but feel I should as it is part and parcel of accepting the role of carer. Its not all caravans and christmas trees. When the weeks going well dont rest on your laurels as there could well be a curve ball hurtling your way.